November 14, 2018

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Stop the "New You" Bullshit

January 11, 2019


In the words of one of my favorite movies….. “Well looky what we have here.”


We are into the second week of the New Year, and I wonder, are you a new person?


Best guess on my end, probably not. I know lots of people that do Dry January(no alcohol), or want to lose weight, or want to make more money, or set a goal they will follow through with for the whole year. Based on estimates that I am making up off the cuff, 75% of all resolutions are dead by January 15th.


Now I am truly and whole heartedly not really a pessimist. In fact, I would dabble more with Nihilism, but the reality of me is that I have a big heart. I have a big heart for my family, and I care so much for so many people. I say that people give up on stuff because I have watched people do it over and over again. I think my roundabout approach to what I want to say today is that, the turn of the calendar IS important. But its NOT the only thing.


2018 turned into 2019. And when the clock hit midnight I still felt the same. I was the same person. I am still living in Brooklyn as I was before. I still work for myself bartending and producing events. I still take pictures of drinks, I make, for a living from time to time. I still want to write long format articles from time to time. I still don’t like Jack Daniels, Fireball and Bud Light. And above all I felt slightly better than I did before(I think that was the Champagne working).


So the question is, “What is different in the New Year?” or any month really?


For me, it was more highly personal that in years past. I consumed a lot more articles on the idea of what and how to be different this year. I think the key lesson that I learned over and over in 2018, and I’m trying to apply to 2019: is that the key difference to change and genuinely making yourself better is SIMPLICITY.




If you got to midnight on December 31, or more likely working off a headache and slurping down black eyed peas on January 1, and you feel like “you had to make a change” then don’t be discouraged on January 11th or July 11th if your life doesn’t look like you want it to. Because the year is long and it won’t always look like you want it to. Sometimes you have to breathe a little deeper and realize that where you are right now is exactly where you need to be.


Sometimes you have to learn things a little harder(I know I always do). Sometimes its light and easy. But most times its not. The key, to me at least, is to keep moving forward and not get bogged down in what others are doing. “But so and so just got this big sponsorship, or a book deal, or 50k followers on IG, or the new guy at work got promoted over me…..”


Those events for others are out your hands. You can only control you. Be consistent.


“I want to get paid to do internet marketing” Great. Make content day in and day out. Meet new people in your space. Mingle. Network. Try something new and different.


“I want to lose a bunch of weight” Then start the next day with one or two intentional extra choices. Walk more than you did yesterday and change or eliminate one food choice. If you are 50 lbs overweight, the weight won’t come off in a day of working out for 2 hrs and starving yourself. It doesn’t work like that.


“I want to be the world’s best bartender…….” This is personal for me. I am NOT the world’s best bartender. But one day I might be. Currently I am on the right side of 40, and lets face it, this is a young persons game. I do have bartending heroes that are over 40. The better question is, “Do I really want to be the best bartender in the world?” Also, how do you quantify best bartender?


I don’t think I have the proper response to that. What I really want to be is happy with what I do. And I can say that I’m getting damn close to being happy with more of what I do. It took me 37 years, but more than anything I know who I AM, and I am comfortable with it.


I will leave you with 3 words to summarize this whole thing.


Simple. Intentional. Consistent.


Be those things in your new year and obstacles will fall and achievements will raise.


Cheers Y’all!

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